Relevance of Mahabharat II

 Introduction

In the last blog I wrote about relevance of Mahabharat by analyzing Bhishma and Dridharashtra. In Mahabharat every character and the actions of each character has more relevance today. Certainly I don’t think I have attained the stage of writing all the Characters as it may amount to writing entire Mahabharat which needs divine blessings of the God. I just planned to analyze few characters and the actions of few characters which have more relevance to our present life.

In addition to Bhishma and Dridharashtra, the character sketch and actions of Drona, Vidhura, Drupada, Kunti, Karna, Draupadi, Duryodhana, Arjuna, Sahadev, Salliya, Aswathama and finally Lord Krishna are extremely relevant. In my view the epic is relevant for every action of ours. We can learn from this epic as to how we should lead our life and how we should conduct ourselves. Lord Krishna’s actions in entire Mahabharat is great and it had strategy, blessings, protection and above all he gives answer to all of us to all our issues and questions.

Drona

In Mahabharata Drona is the most learned person. He not only read four vedas but also read fifth Veda which is art of archery, war strategy and use of weapons. Though by birth he is a Brahmin and he learnt Vedas but he also learnt the use of weapons and war strategy which is meant for Khashtriyas i.e Kings and the rulers. When a man of his stature has read so much he is expected to act in a more neutral way. Not only that he should control his senses and also he should preach what he learnt and never should he use of any of the art he learnt for his purpose. But did he do that? He too deviated from this path and his action started the downfall.

During his Gurukul days he and Drupada were friends. In that friendship Drupada promises to Drona that once he becomes king after completion of Gurukul days he would take care of Drona as Drona was poor Brahmin. As expected Drona goes to Drupada when Drupada becomes King and Drupada forgets the promise he made to Drona and insults Drona. Now Drona is upset and he wanted to take revenge on Drupada. Bhishma identifies Drona as a right teacher for both Pandavas and Gauravas. After teaching to Pandavas and Gauravas, Drona seeks “Gurudkashina” from Arjun, whom he considered as his favorite disciple. He request Arjun to go and fight with Drupada and also seeks Arjun to imprison Drupada. Arjun also does the same and he imprisons Drupada. Though Drona later releases Drupadha, Drupadha did not forget this insult heaped on him by Drona. He prays to Lord to bless him with a daughter and son; Daughter to marry Arjun and Son to kill Drona. In the end the King was blessed by Draupathi who marries Arjun later and Dristadhyumnan who later kills Drona.

Now let us stop and look at the action of Drona and Drupada

·         When both are best friends both had a great understanding and relation. When Drupada forgets and insults Drona is upset.

·         Drona seeks revenge and result is Drupada is imprisoned by Arjun.

·        Drona who was a teacher and man who studied four Vedas should have the grace of forgiving Drupada. But he refused to do and he wanted to take revenge.

·        The act of taking revenge by Drona leads to one more revenge from Drupadha and creates a permanent enmity between Drona and Drupadha.

·         Drupadha had committed but he failed to honor the commitment

·        Drona who was highly educated and most erudite person did not act according to his education and learning but deviated from the dharma suggested by Vedas which he should have followed but practiced the revenge which is the approach of a ruler or a warrior..

·         In the end Drona creates his own enemy and he writes his own downfall.

Relevance to today

·       Once it is committed and you are in a position to honor the commitment, never go back on the words.

·        The best of friendship can be maintained only if one has the grace of forgetting and forgiving. If act of forgiving is replaced by act of revenge, it leads to dangerous consequences and leads to disaster.

·        Any friendship or relation if is to be successful should be based on a good and sound understanding.

·        If friendship or relation is to be successful one of the persons in the relation should have patience, and also should learn the art of forgiving because in any relation difference of views or failure to meet one’s expectations is inevitable.

·        If revenge becomes the order then every act of revenge will lead to one more act of revenge and it will continue till last and it destroys both.

·        That is what happened between Drona and Durupadha. A simple act of forgiving was not practiced. An act of revenge by Drona lead to another act of revenge by Drupada and it continued till last.

Drona and Eklavya

When Drona was teaching to his students’ i.e Pandava and Gauravas, Eklavya who was the King for a Tribal region approached Drona to teach him. Drona refused as Eklavya was not a Kshatriya as Drona was willing to teach only for Kshatriyas. When Eklavya persisted, Drona allowed Eklavya to consider Drona as his guru in his heart and permitted him to practice. So Eklavya embarks on self-study and becomes a good archer but he still considered Drona as his Guru. Drona comes to know about it and he wanted to protect his best pupil Arjuna as Ekalavya was considered as good as Arjun. Hence Drona in order to protect Arjun,asks Eklavya to sacrifice his right thumb as “Gurudakshnina” and Eklavya sacrifices his thumb as a “Gurudakshina”. Since Drona committed to Arjuna that he would be number 1 archer, he did not prefer competition to Arjun in any form. Hence he used Gurudakshnina as a route to kill competition to Arjun. The rat race and competition for number 1 slot was prevailing even in Mahabhrat days.

Again Drona is a teacher. A good Teacher’s trait is to encourage students and he should be impartial to all. Again Drona failed here. The impact is simple. It came to him in a different way in his end. Drona had a great son and his name was Aswathama. Aswathama was a great warrior and he was one of the most learned person in Gauravas side . He was considered next to Bhishma and Drona in knowledge of Shastras, Vedas and war strategy. But the death of Drona and the act of Aswathama in the end of Mahabharata must be due to the sins committed by Drona by deviating from the path of justice which we will see later.

Kunti

The life of Kunti is the most important and offers a great teaching. Whenever we read Kunti’s life Karna’s life is inseparable part of it. In this blog I intend to analyze Kunti’s life related to Karna as that is more important in my view.

Prior to marriage Kunti was blessed by Sage Duruvasha and was taught few mantras and whenever she recites those mantras thinking about a god, she will get blessed with a son with the qualities of god whom she worshipped. As soon as she got the blessing of the sage, she wanted to try and immediately she looked at Lord Surya (Sun God) and worshipped him with that Mantra. With the result she was blessed with a son and he became Karna. (I am not getting into debate on scientific analysis of these issues as to how a person can get all these and morality issues which I will give it in my final blog)  Since she was not married she keeps Karna in a small box with her clothes and leaves it in river. This had a great impact on Kunti and Karna’s life . Let us analyse the consequences of this in their lives.

      ·         Kunti was not even matured enough to understand the travails of birth of a child and she   aspired for it. With the result neither she was happy nor did Karna.

·         Till the end Kunti and Karna suffered due to this.

·         Karna was acknowledged as son of Kunti only at the time of his death.

·         Though Kunti and Karna come to know about this just prior to battle, Karna request Kunti not to divulge this.

·         Karna knew Pandavas were his brothers and he wages battle against his own brothers to repay his gratitude to Duryodhana.

·         Yudhishir in the end became inconsolable on hearing Karna was his eldest brother and they Killed Karna. He even goes to accusing Kunti and Krishna pacifies both Yudhishtir and Kunti at that stage.

·         The moral is simple:

o   In life God or Destiny decides what you should get. You need to put your efforts to achieve the goal. If you try to get it before it is due to you or you snatch before it is due to you neither it bestows happiness to you nor you will be successful. Further the position or the product which you get due to this will also suffer.

o   Both the creator and illegitimate product will fail at the end. The fate of an illegitimate product despite the best of all characteristics will suffer at the end. Everything needs to be legitimate.

o   In life what you are entitled and what you deserve you will get provided you are sincere to yourselves.

o   Very often we pray to God and God does not answer the prayers immediately and he may answer very late. God has listened to our prayer but whether we deserve it or can we handle if we get it is the issue that we need to answer it to ourselves? God will give only when we can handle it. God will not give when we cannot handle it. If we still try to get it by any dubious method or means, it will lead to disaster.

o   Sometimes due to luck you or by grace of God are bestowed with rare qualities. One should know how to practice and when to practice. If it is practiced in immature manner, the result will be bad.

Conclusion

As I said earlier every character in this great epic has a teaching and relevance to our present life. I will analyze some more characters in next blog.

Relevance of Mahabharat-I

Introduction

I am always fascinated by the story of Mahabharat. I must have read the story at least 10 times written by different authors. Heard the discourse by eminent persons at least 10 times. Each time when I read I am learning one new aspect relevant to life and relevant to present context. Even prior to Teleserial in Mahabharat in 1980's, I used to attend discourses in Tamil by Pulavar Keeran, Nagai Mukundahan etc; I must have read Mahabharat written by Late C.Rajagopalachari many times. From my younger days I am fascinated by the story and each character. In my view the entire story sketch of Mahabharat, characters in Mahabharat and the role played by each of them is so relevant to our present life.

Background and relevance

Mahabharat was a story between the cousins who fought against each other due to jealous fuelled by deceit and lust for power. The lust blinds and forces person to take wrong decisions and one need to face the consequences of the wrong decisions. The lust for power, lust for fame and lust for wealth increases the jealousy and it blinds people at critical times. Due to this all the decisions would be wrong and one writes their own downfall. 

Let us look at few instances

Dridharashtra (Duryodhana’s father) was advised by many ministers and eminent people like Bhishma, Vidhura and Drona not to have a war and was advised many times to give away 50% of the Kingdom to Pandavas. In fact he was reminded about the insult and injury happened to Draupadi in his court and he was warned that defaming a lady and disrobing her clothes is the most atrocious crime that can be committed by King. Having committed that sin Dridharashtra was advised by all to follow the commitment given to Yudhistir and give away 50% of the Kingdom. But he refuses to listen. Why? Is it because of his affection on his sons? Is it the only reason? No. His lust for the power which arises from two factors:

·         Though he was eldest he did not get an opportunity to rule the Kingdom when he was young and that was given to his younger brother Pandu who became the King. He was feeling jealous from the day Pandu was crowned as King and that jealous increased his lust for power.

·         When Yudhishtir was defeated in the game of dice and lost the Kingdom, though he felt bad and sad for them, but within himself he was happy because now he could become the King for the entire Kingdom.

·         His affection on his sons who did not follow any good principles blindfolded him completely and did not allow him to listen to good advice.

Normally whenever we do mistakes god in theist language and Nature in atheist language gives an indication in a different manner and forewarns that what is being done is not correct and gives an opportunity to correct. Even in this case it was not an exception.  Lord Krishna shows his Viswaroopa darshan to him when he was going as an emissary of Pandavas to plead on their behalf. He showed his Viswaroopam darshan to the King and warns him in different way. It was said when he showed his Viswaroopam to king everybody in that palace became blind for few minutes but Dridharashtra who was blind got the eye sight for few minutes just to see Lord’s Viswaroopa darshan. The reason for Lord Showing his Viswaroopam darshan to king was simple. He has given a message and through that he also informs him that “A powerful person like me will be on side with Pandavas and I will protect them. When a person like me comes and request you to give back the Kingdom to Pandavas you better give. Don’t expect that you can defeat them. “ But Dridharasthra never listens nor understood the message.  He wrote his own downfall and had he listened to the advise of Ministers and finally to the words of Lord Krishna he could have averted the war and the loss of so many lives.

The relevance is simple

·         The king should be right and honest. If the King is not right or honest the impact is not only on the King but on the subjects and the kingdom.

·         Never ever  develop jealous on any matter. If you are jealous you will not enjoy what you get and what you have. Finally what you get on account jealous or lust will not stay with you.

·         The jealous is starting point for lust and lust makes one to lose the ability to take right decisions.

·         The leader should take impartial decisions and he should not be blindfolded on any matters.

·         A commitment for a wrong cause and with wrong company even if it is your own people will not further the cause but only will only create a downfall.

Love and Sacrifice- Aspect of Relation Management

Mahabharat is a classic piece to educate us on relation management.  Normally in every relation the expectation is equally intense or equally reciprocating. But sometimes or very often the relation is influenced by requirements of other person. The love or affection will be there as long as the requirement of the other person is there. The moment the relevance of other person is lost to our life or our requirement on other person is over the relation becomes insignificant and the respect for relation is lost.  Let us take few characters and their approach:

Bhishma’s life

Bhishma’s life is a classic example of his love for being taken for granted and through his life he spent time on serving others. He sacrificed his marriage due to his love on his father. Since his father had developed love on Sathiyavathi and in order to allow his father to marry Sathiyavthi he sacrificed his marriage life and he took a vow to continue to be a bachelor. Again here Bhishma was completely blindfolded by his emotional love on his father and his father took advantage. Had he not sacrificed his life may be Mahabharat would not have been there. This is the starting point for Mahabharat.

Next his love on his Pandavas. His love and affection on Pandavas was very high; More than his love on Duryodhana;. But despite his love and natural affection on Pandavas, he fought against them in war. Reason is simple. He is indebted to his Kingdom Hasthinapur and he took a vow that he would fight battle till last to protect his kingdom. Though he did not like any of the acts of Duryodhana, he was on Duryodhana’s side because of his commitment and vow to protect Hasthinapur. Duryodhana knows his weakness and his love and commitment on Kingdom and he took advantage of his love and commitment. Duryodhana never followed Bhishma’s words. If Duryodhana had some respect for Bhishma’s words he would have followed some of his advice; unfortunately he never followed his advice but he used Bhishma’s love for his personal purpose.

Bhishma realizes the mistake of Duryodhana and his father and he advises many times. They did not heed his advice. Though Bhishma realizes that he is waging a losing battle but he decided to go for war and agreed to lead Duryodhana and his brothers in war.  When he is in the last stages and he falls on arrow’s bed in his last days, he teaches Dharma and about the importance of life and principles to be followed. This day is called “Bhishma Ekadasi”. On Lord Krishna’s advice Bhishmacharya answered all the questions that Yudhishtira asked with regard to the duties of a good ruler, and the principles of right and wrong. This conversation between Bhishmacharya.s and Yudhishtira is nothing but .Sri Vishnu Sahasranaama. The day on which Bhishma taught is Ekadasi day and that day is called “Bhishma Ekadasi” which is the most revered day for all Vaishnavites and devotees of Lord Krishna and Mahavishnu.

The relevance of Bhishma’s life

·         His love on his father is high and he decided to be a bachelor through his life for the sake of his father.  Bhishma’s was blessed by his father to decide his day of death and Bhishma committed to save the Kingdom and the King who will rule Hastinapur.

·         He is aware that Duryodhana and his brothers are taking advantage of his love and commitment to his Kingdom and Duryodhana brothers did not heed to their advice.

·         He went on to complete his commitment and his promise to his father, his commitment to protect his Kingdom notwithstanding the fact he lost his bachelor life, Duryodhana and brother never listened to his advice.

·         The commitment of Bhishma was completely used by Duryodhana to commit all mistakes. The moral is though you may be righteous person and honest person, if you commit to a wrong person what comes back to you is pain and not enjoyment on this. Bhishma was pained through his life due to Duryodhana and he was prevented to do any thing because of his commitment to Kingdom and his vow to protect the legacy of Shantanu and the ruler of Hastinapur.

·         The end is simple: Though he lost the war at the end he is one of the few souls in Duryodhana who was blessed by Lord and he got the blessings of Lord Krishna to preach “Vishnu Sahasranamam” which is the most popular in today’s world.

The difference between Dridharashtra and Bhishma was simple. Dridharashtra love was fuelled by Jealous and lust for power where as Bhishma’s commitment was laced by love, sacrifice and good thoughts. Bhishma ‘s commitment was to protect the Kingdom and laced with justice whereas Dridharashtra ‘s commitment was opposite. The relevance is simple:

If the commitment is accompanied with Love, Right thoughts and constructive thoughts, you will be rewarded in some way or manner by Lord; Though Bhishma was pained in his lfe due to the acts of Duryodhana, yet his end was a memorable and Lord Krishna blesses Bhishma at his death by making him to teach to this whole world. On the other hand if the commitment is accompanied with jealous, deceit and lust, neither you will enjoy nor the subject or the object you gain will stay with you for long.

Since I cannot explain in three pages I started with few characters and I tend to explain other characters in my next blogs. Let me explain in next blog how other characters explain to our life.

Who will cry when you cry- Law of Limitations

Who will cry when you cry- Law of Limitations

I have read Robin Sharma’s book “Who will cry when you die” but I was thinking of a situation who will cry when you cry. After death what happens nobody knows but during the period of life what happens is an important fact. It was said that every aspect of relation is influenced by certain equal expectations from others. In life I always wonder do we create an expectation on relation but miss or ignore the relation.  The other important aspect in life may be a rule is that in most important situations we remember the people whom we like and invariably we miss the people whom we like.  These aspects make me to think on some of the aspects of life and also my experiences on some of the matters connected with this.

Every individual in his life will undergo some tough moments and some emotional moments. One become stronger and can emerge stronger during tough moments if the person has determination and his determination will see him through. On Emotional moments the person should ensure that he does not succumb to emotions and carry his emotions through to himself and leave the emotions behind. The emotions which left behind become a good lesson for the future. In my view” Experience is a best lesson that a person can have”.  Experience teaches everything in life but sometimes it is extremely painful too.

In younger days I used to have lot of friends and lot of people around me.  I never used to have time to think on failures as my mind is always cheerful and playful.  Enjoyed every bit in those relations because no expectations on either side. The mind was not matured but relations were stronger and at that age we enjoy everything; No disappointments because no expectations; Rarely one get hurt emotionally and even if a person gets hurt emotionally by one there are so many other people around us will always cheer you. But when we grow up, we believe we become more matured as our mind also grows up, but the relations today is not stronger as it used to be; Most of our relations though we believe it is stronger somewhere suffers from expectation gap or failure to understand the basic tenet of a humanness behind the relation; Another reason for such a state of affairs in relation is probably we spend less time in nurturing a relation or trying to understand other person. Finally the ego or lack of ego gets into any relation due to differences in stature, fear on the other person and may be a person’s decision to value the relation based on the nature of benefit that comes out of that relation. It becomes constant endeavor of us to give value addition in the relation in order to encourage mutual reciprocation. In today’s world the most apt saying in my view is “I reciprocate love on you as long as I need you”.  When one of my colleagues tells me that I have great network and I have strong relation with lot others my response is that “people will exhibit love as long as they need me”.  

One of the persons whom I consider so close and treat that person so high once remarked that “ I am confused on you as to what you are and I am not able to gauge you”. Another person who is very close to me whom I love so much as a person remarked “Sekar I know I am in your list of the most important person but you are not in my list”. I thought through. Though these may be casual remarks but still it made me to think as to what I am. I concluded though I like to be somebody for the people whom I love but finally I am nobody to anybody.

In last two weeks I got into touch with a person whom i really liked after a gap of 28 years. I started knowing this person when I was 14 years old and I maintained my contacts till I was 19 years. Post that I lost touch and contacts with that person. But certainly the impact of four years is very high as it is in my memory for last 28 years and remember everything about that person, my old days of conversation despite my preoccupation in my life with various other matters. Though i am extremely happy on this development but not sure whether this will continue as very often destiny is the decider. In life the relation matrix gets changed when we grow up. It is not the problem with the people but problem in our mind.

I remembered to have read a poem in Tamil which indicated to me that “Life is like a mirror. You see what you are and you get what you give”  I am not sure whether it applies every-time in life but sometimes I believe that we should carry positively and take every aspect as a learning curve and proceed. The law of limitation not only applies in legal sense but also in emotional life. Who will cry when you cry- It is the limitation law prescribed by nature will decide.

I miss you Ma

In life a persons biggest asset is his or her mom. The affection love and guidance from mother is extraordinary. We were taught as Mata, Pita, Guru and Deyvam (Mother, Father, Teacher and God). Mother gets first priority because it is the mother who shows the world. It is the mother who shows the father. It is with father she identifies Guru and with Guru the mother and father shows the god. Mother is there everywhere.
You have given birth to me, guided me through the life, taught me everything and finally left me. It is more than a week that you have left me and I am still recovering from your loss. I am not sure when i am going to get out of it because in this world everything is available except mother and mothers affection.
You were not a professional like me. You did not address so many seminars like me. You did not attend so many client meetings like me. You did not interact with so many professionals like me. But Amma, your worldly knowledge and experience is much more than all the combined knowledge of mine which i accumulated by going to school, studying CA, working in a big organisation and above all interacting with so many professionals. Without attending even a high school you taught me the way in which i can overcome every issue. I remember many of your guidances and advise but certainly I will follow the following guidances till my last: (i) Never allow success to go to your head. (ii) What you do to others will come back to you in the same speed. (iii) If you like others help them and do what is best to them from your end. But never ever tell others.(iv)Be committed to whatever you do and be sincere in what you do.(v) Money can come anytime. but try to get good people with you as once you lose trust of the good people you cannot get the same good people.(vi)Relation cannot come overnight. If you need relation you need to give up something. The first thing you need to give up in maintaining relation is Ego and "I"(vii) People may insult you and dont try to hit back. You always quote an example Can a person spit on a sky and if person spits it falls on them.(viii) Your advise to me that the best Dhan(donation) is giving education to a poor person and donating for a poor person marraiage because both gives life to others.


Every day my mobile will have a call from you and even if i forget to enquire about you, you will enquire about me. If i say i am stressful on various matters Your words "Take care my son and my blessings are there for you." was so sweet to my ears and that used to ease out so much of my pressure. I will miss this.


I was in hospital on a serious ailment. At the age of 79 and despite your physical disabilities in walking, you went to nearby temple and prayed to god for my recovery and went around the temple twice at that age . You undertook fasting for my sake at the age of 79 by praying to god when i was going through the ailment. Finally when i was going through some emotional issues in the month of June 2011, I cried by keeping my head on your laps. You did not even ask the reason but your words "Dont worry my son. If you are good you will get back what you miss dont worry".


I wanted to show the friend whom i considered most dear to me. You met that friend when that person came to my home when you were with me. Thanks for that meeting though it lasted for few minutes.


Your words to my mentor "I have pampered him like a kid and please take care of him" showed how much you care for me. Your advise to me that i should not leave this firm because your eagerness that I should be with good people made my career here. I owe you everything Ma.


I will miss everything henceforth. But I got enough from you and I have become permanent creditor to you. I hope with your blessings i can be a good person and useful to the pople whom i love and follow your advise. Seeking your blessings always and please protect me wherever you are.



I miss you Amma. I miss you so much. I may be 45 and father of two kids and but "Mom is Mom" Always your blessings and your spirit will take care of the rest of my life.

My Inspirations- Part I

Normally whenever we start our journey we look for the path which will take us to destination. In life too in addition to the path, we also chose the people with whom we should like to travel or who can inspire us. I was also not an exception. I have chosen few people whom i would like to be associated notwithstanding the fact how they consider me.
From my younger days I used to read and listen to the epic stories of Ramayan and Mahabharat due to which I generated interest in each character in that epic stories. I also watched some of the best Tamil and Telugu movies which changed my thoughts on some of the aspects of my life. I also listened to great songs composed by famous music trinity and by other poets which refined some of my thoughts on life. I am also a great fan of Tamil poets Bharatiyar and Kanndasan. Truly some of their songs and lines made me to think or look at the life differently. I am great movie bluff till 1990 and great lover of Carnatic music and some old Telugu and Tamil songs.Certainly i cannnot forget two movies Sankarabharanam and Sagara Sangamam directed by K. Vishwanath in Telugu. I would have seen those movies at least 25 to 30 times. Certainly I was influenced by these movies on dedictation to profession, relation and above all commitment to relation. The influences of those charatcers though may be fictional characters must have contributed to my title"Emotional Fool".

Similarly on Strategy i am greatly inspired by Lord Krishna in Mahabharat and Mahatma Gandhi. Both had a strategy but both displayed in a different way to achieve their goals. An interesting similarity in those stratgies are: They followed simple thinking, They focussed on building relation.They focussed on their competencies and did not aspire for position.But their positions are most talked. They are king makers and more powerful than King. They followed human touch wherever they need to win over the people. They created leaders to achieve their purpose. Those leaders followed them to the core.

In my view as i understand though Gandhi read Ramayan more but in my analysis his strategy is largely influenced by Krishna's strategy.Lord Krishna's strategy in Mahabharat is more apt for us to follow to win over any difficult circumstance. In fact there are many interesting instances in Mahabharat as to how Lord Krishna thinks and how he wins over people. Even when he resuces he gives a message. Even when teaches a lesson to his favourable disciple or friend Arjun he does in his own style .

Protection to Draupadi: When the Kauravas tried to dishonor Draupadi through “Cheer Haran” (removing her sari) in a hall of people, she Prayed to Krishna continuously. The lord took care of her honor but when? Dushadhana on the instruction of Duryodhana started removing her sari and Draupadi starts chanting "Krishna, Krishna". But Krishna did not protect immediately. Till such time Draupadi keeps her hand on her chest and screams Krishna, the god does not come. But finally when she realises that Dushadhana is in last lap of removing her sari she realises she is helpless, she throws her hand and Krishna comes at that time. Krishna answers later that why he did not come immediately when Draupadi started screaming. He says that initially Draupadi was more believing her than Lord, as she kept her hands on her chest and was of the belief that by holding her chest she can prevent Dushadana. But when she finally throws her hand towards sky and towards Krishna she surrendered to Krishna completely. He says "I will come only when the person completely surrenders with me ". Though Krishna comitted to Draupdai that he will proect her, he came only when Draupadi could not protect her by herself. Had he desired he could have prevented Dushadhana act at the begining but he came at final stages only allowing Draupadi to go through the motions and finally he protected. The message is simple from Lord.

You need to fight your own battle and make your efforts to succeed. I will proect people at a time when they deserve and only after the subject go through the motions. "Finally if you need me, you need to surrender to me completely." This aspect of Krishna's teaching is prevailing in every place in Mahabharat.

In every aspect of Krishna's strategy his love towards the subjects was great and he displayed love even towards the people who considered Krishna as his enemy. He never considered anybody as his enemy but gave lot of time and opportunities for people to change and mend their ways toward him. This is the trait of a real leader. A real leader is one who never shows any hatred or ill will towards others despite they oppose him.
In real life too we come across various situations. Though we are not Lord but as a human being we will always be considerate with others and shower love and affection on others. Sometimes we get worried by what others think or sometimes we get carried away by a burden of expectations. But if we carry with our belief and focus on our actions with simple thinking and belief in god we will cross every hurdle which comes in our life with ease.

Have a great "Ugadhi." 23/3/2012

Commitment- Does it make sense

Commitment
Very often I am stumped by this words Commitment. Sometimes we use this word very loosely signifying our intent to do something for others. At the same time I have heard from people that "What is there in commitment" and when they breach the commitment the easiest justification is "Did I give that in writing". Our mind goes for justification to justify a breach of our commitment. I have heard different views and my experience is different. Not only my experience but my view that once a commitment is given it is final till last.
I am not talking here about a personal commitment in family or a business commitment. But I am talking about commitment which we share or give it to others out of relation,friendship, mentor or towards a cause.

To illustrate a commitment I go back to my favorite epics in Ramayana and Mahabharata. In Ramayana I see few commitments

Bharath to Ram.
Though Bhararth had an opportunity to rule the kingdom yet he chose to rule as a trustee of Ram by keeping his padhukas in his chair. In my view this is a commitment by Bharath to Ram as Ram being his eldest brother, his love on Ram; all the more he does not want people to consider him as a traitor. This commitment is borne out of natural love due to the fact Ram being a brother and fear of being labelled as a traitor.
Ram to Sugreeva.
Ram committed to kill Vali and he honoured that commitment of killing Vali by standing behind a tree. This is a need based commitment as he needs Sugreeva's help to search Sita and to fight Ravana.

Kumbakarana's commitment to Ravana
Kumbakarna who is Ravanas younger brother advises Ravan of his wrong doing and request him to send back Sita and desist from waging a war against Ravana. Though Ravan does not listen, Kumbakarna choses to fight for Ravan and die. Kumbakarna knows that he will not win the war and he knows his end. Despite he chose to fight for his brother. Again this is the commitment which was undertaken by Kumbakarna to stand by his loyalty to his brother
Hanumans commitment to Ram
Hanuman commitment to Ram is purely arising out of love dedication and his belief in Ram. There is no blood relation between Hanuman and Ram unlike others. This was not a need based commitment like Ram to Sugreeva. In fact Ram took more of Lord Hanuman's help.This was purely a commitment which arises out of love affection and dedication and not a reciprocal arrangement or expectation of something.

Similarly let me come to Mahabharata. In Mahabharata we can read and hear lot of commitments but I would like to give thoughts on few commitments.
Karna to Duryodhana
Again this is a commitment by Karna to Duryodhana to stand by him and his friendship as it was Duryodhana who identified Karna and made him a King. This is very interesting relation because Karna was prepared to give himself and prepared to battle out for Duryodhana. Despite the fact he realizes that he is the eldest of Pandavas and his mother is Kunti yet he chose to rescind the kingdom but prepared to go with Duryodhana. On the other hand Duryodhana chose Karna because he was impressed by his skill and he is the best bet to beat Arjuna. Duryodhana's commitment to Karna is laced with Selfishness. Karna sacrificed himself and the offer of position and his mothers affection which he was craving for the sake of his friendship and loyalty towards Duryodhana.
Lord Krishna's commitment to Pandavas.
Lord Krishna committed to protect Pandavas till last and he honours his word. But this was a commitment by Lord to protect his devotees and to stand by the purpose of his birth. Pandavas were the devotees of Lord Krishna and sought his commitment to protect them till last.

But when we compare all those commitments what stands out is Lord Hanuman's commitment to Ram and Karna's commitment to Duryodhana. Both are selfless, carries no expectations and only laced with love, affection, dedication and loyalty. Both Hanuman and Karna were used by Ram and Duryodhana, yet they allow themselves to be be used and stood by their cause. The only difference is Lord Hanuman was to Ram who was more righteous but Karna was towards a human being who did not have the right qualities.

In my view every commitment always comes with difficulties. Sometimes hurt or wound or in a language of my friend "Self Inflicted Wound". I have heard so many comments on this commitment and some of them are

In today's world even there is a break between husband and wife. What is so great about this commitment to others be it any person.

These commitments may appear to be one sided as one person is in a position of strength and other is in a position of weakness and others can exploit the commitment for his advantage.

In today's materialistic world why commitment to somebody or some cause and make me like a fool or create a self inflicted wound as others does not understand.

Some of the statements or arguments may appear to be true. But in my view and experience the commitment which does not have any expectations and which comes out of natural love, affection, regards, respect on others will stand out. When we try to honour the commitment we are faced with with various challenges and in the process we get hurt by the same person to whom we commit. But despite this in my view a person should carry on to keep up his word or commitment. The question that often posed to me is what happens if we break the commitment. My view is simple. It is very easy to break and every act of breaking can be justified. But it is difficult to honour a commitment and work on that despite challenges. In my experience a commitment to spouse or father or mother will have a personal discipline and commitment to friend, mentor or to a good and genuine person will have a social discipline. I have lot of examples on this comitment which has changed some aspects of my life.

I dont think we can be Lord Hanuman or Karna as we neither have Lord Ram or even Duryodhana amidst us. But certainly if we have few traits of Hanuman or Karna and carry ourselves with a sense of commitment as it makes lot of sense depsite we may encounter "Self Inflicted Wound".

Have a great week ahead.

Straight from Heart

Straight from Heart- Title
I chose this title for this blog, as this was the phrase used by my good friend Shanto. He used this phrase twice. Once on his farewell day i.e day when he was leaving from Bangalore to US . Next he used when he met me during last week. He is one of the few persons who always believed me and my personal strengths and looked at me from a different perspective. I always felt i am too straight and certainly carry more emotions more than a normal person and with the result people may not prefer me as a person. He is of the view that my biggest strength on relation is that I think from my heart and not from my brain. But i used to ponder whether it is a strength. Can a relation be nurtured in such an emotional manner . How many people can think like Shanto and in my view few and in my experience hardly i have come across any person in my first circle who has a heart of reciprocation. It may also be due to our own internal emotional conflicts because in every relation, we set expectations consciouly or sub-consciouly and when the expectations are not met we get into different moods and more of a negative side of it. So does it mean that it calls for a change in my thinking or in my approach ?

In life we learn from others experience or we learn from our own experience. The realisation by us in our own life will make us to change for better. I also realised the need for change. I also felt the need for change six months back. Somewhere in the month of June i realised and thanks to my dearest friend who opened my eyes. We always meet various people and some people influence us in a more positive manner and some people influence our thinking. I also got changed due to one of my closest friend who influenced my thinking. The change which brought me was two fold. One self realisation on mine and second not to create any expectations from any relation.
Self realisation
During the month of June I received worst ever drubbing from the most unexpected person in my life. I realised on that fateful day. My realisation was simple.I felt little bit ashamed of myself on my past when i used to express my negative side of the emotions and used to take on people be it officially or professionally or personally. If i can feel bad on drubbing by somebody who is so close to my heart, how much others would have felt bad due to me. Post that i realised an immediate need to change myself. I made an attempt to change but i am not sure about the success. But certainly people do tell me now that this Sekar is different from the old sekar. Many thanks to that friend who taught me and opened my eyes.
Relation without expectations
This incidence also opened my eyes on other thought. Is it possible to have a relation without expectations. In life we meet various people. We like to treat some people as passers by, some people as genuine friends and likes to create the relation for life and some people just as acquaintainces. There is no set rule but all of us have preferences. Each preference is governed by set of circumstances and certain expectations out of it.

Should we create all this relation with expectations? I am not saying everybody does it. Certainly an average person like me gets that thought. It is human and i dont like to feel gulity about it. But when the expectations are not met certainly it impacts us. Very often we like to give something for somebody or try to help others or try to assist others. We try to do this purely for the sake of relation or the enjoyment that we derive from that relation or friendship.
The relation may last and in my view it is possible to last only we continue to love the relation without any expectations. Continue to love the relation though the other person may not attach importance to it. This is possible only if we have no expectations. I tell to some of the people " Everybody will love me as long as they need me" when they talk about relation management. The challenge therefore before us is that as an individual we need to keep on buidling up value addition in our relation. Not only value addition in our professional relation but also in any relation.
Belief in your thought
I recall the story in Mahabharat. Lord Krishna was sleeping in the afternoon which is the most unusual. Both Duryodhana and Arjuna comes to meet him to take Lord's help for the battle. Lord has two offers. One his complete Army without Lord and second Lord himself but without any arms and condition that he will no fight. The offer was given to Duryodhana first and he prefers Krishna's army as he thought with army he could defeat others but Arjuna preferred Lord. Ultimately the blessing of Lord helped Pandavas to win the battle. The moral here is simple. Arjuna loved Lord but Duryodhana preferred material out of the lord. (Though Arjuna was taught lesson by Lord in different time due to his arrogance) .If relation is created for the benefit it may not last but if relation is created only for the respect, love and regards on others, it may last .
C.Rajagopalachari (Rajaji) in one of his speeches used to say " when knowledge becomes matured it becomes wisdom" May be i am trying to become more matured on every aspect of my life. Many thanks to that friend who taught me and opened my eyes. One of my lawyer friends and my Rakhi sister used to describe me that "My IQ on tax and profession is high but my EQ on relation is very low". I hope my EQ also becomes higher in the days to come.
Have a great week ahead.

First Lesson- A step

It gave me a different feeling when i completed my first blog. Though i wrote books on taxation and articles on taxation, when I wrote first time on a non-tax subject, i felt happy because i could communicate very honestly and without offending anyperson. Many times during my discussions with some of the people when i explain the experience and the lesson which i learnt, people used to ask me to share my thoughts and my experiences.I never felt or realised that i have reached a stage where i can share my experiences or becoming like a guru to somebody. Even today i dont think i have come to that stage but certainly i thought after completing my first blog i wanted to share a lot through this to the people whom i know. May be after reading this some of the negative impressions on me can change and sometimes people may believe me more or people may get tips.
The first aspect which i wanted to write a little bit more is on "Emotions" as i carry a tag " Emotional Fool" from my dearest friend . Very often it is misunderstood by others or people use the emotions in a most negative manner. Me being a person with lot of emotions wanted to share my experiences on this. I converted some of the emotions into positive side rather than negative and my also my relaisation which enabled me to stop my shouting and yelling on others. Lot of people ask me how i could i change or reduce my shouting or yelling or taking on the people. The realisation which i underwent six months back was dramatic and it helped me change drastically. I am not sure whether i have changed completely but i can assure that i have taken steps seriously to change. I will also share later on how i realised or the process of realisation.

My first emotional moment was the loss of my father on Febraury 14 1989. I passed the CA on Jan 14 1989 and my father struggled every bit to see me in that position. I still remember the day my result was out. Those days in the absence of internet or technology we used to go CA Institute in Nungambakkam High Road in Chennai and see the results at midnight. I took my friend Vish whom we affectinaley call as Punk to see the result. I bet on his luck instead of my efforts as he was successful earlier in my intermediate exams. So again i took him for Final result and he told me that i got through the exams. After seeing the result in midnight i took the first train and reached my hiome. My father was standing outside since 5 AM to know my result and the moment i told him my success he could not hide his joy and his happiness was all there . I realised that he had on expectations on me as some of his friends were well known CA in Chennai those days. May be he was under the impression that his son will also become successful like his friends . As expected by him I got the job in S.B. Billimoria&Co in their audit team and supposed to join on Feb 15th 1989 but i lost him on Feb 14 1989. That was an absolute rude shock to me and it took years for me to get out og it. It is an understatement if i say i got out of it because even today whenever i receive any accolodaes from any person i think of him and tears will roll down. His teachings to me were simple. To give an example, whenever we used to think that why we are at low ebb compared to others or why we need to go through some of the tough moments in our life, his answer was simple which i follow even today to the core. "God brings the man in deep waters not to drown him but to cleanse him". In other words i realised how every difficult situation gives an opportunity to you to improve upon yourself and contribute.
Certainly the emotional loss was big one and even today i.e after almost 22 years of loss still i think of him i can become emotional because i miss him to the core as he is not near to me to see me and my growth. What i am saying through this lines is that the loss and consequential emotional impact on me made me to work more and more to achieve what he wanted me to achieve.
I was converting every aspect of the emotions in the first few years towards my profession and work because that was the only way by which i could supress my emotional feelings on the loss of my father. Essentially the loss which i suffered and the emotions which i had on that loss diverted to my work because the work helped me to overcome the loss. Many of my colleagues call me as "workaholic". May be this could be starting point for that. The emotions which i had was diverted positvely and in my view but for that emotional loss, i am not sure whether i would have reached this stage. This was my first step and may be i was successful in conversion of negative emotions or emotional loss into positive one. I may be sharing how other two instances of negative converted into positive energy and how i managed.

The reason is simple. Every one of us have emotions. For somebody it is hidden and for somebody it becomes known. The emotional person is not negative and certainly he or she needs a support. If those emotions are not negative emotions and what he needs a solace,never deny unless you believe that support has an agenda or it encoraches on your personal life. Again the weakness of an emotional person is his extraordinary affection on a person or an obsession on a particular object or goal. If that affection or obsession is not negative or does not encorach on your personal value system, be a supportve to him and be kind to him and certainly his negative will be converted into positive. I will touch this portion more when i start blogging on positive emotions and negative emotions.

In my view an emotional person is like a kid. A kid needs mother help or fathers help to walk by holding their hands. Post that the kid will become independent. If you are a good friend for him he will be loyal to you forever as an emotional person can or will never forget the good which has been done. Certainly i am going to share more on this because whatever i have achieved today is only because of my emotions, which i converted into passion. Have a great day.

Emotional Fool

I just started blogging today. I found that expressing views on any matter in a more rational manner helps a person lot. Very often every one of us have certain views on certain matters and it may not be possible to communicate to the concerned person for various reasons or to people at large. May be the blogging can help me to overcome. I am starting against this background.

Today the topic which i started is " Emotional Fool". I liked this because my dearest friend has given this title to me. I am not sure how much the person meant or what that person intended to communciate though knowing that person very well, the same is not intended to use in a derogatroy manner. I thought i could give some views on this.

Every one of us have emotions. Without emotions a person cannot survive. Some people knows how to control it or some people knows how to express it. But the excessive emotions may not be a good. Every one of us carry certain weakness spot. When the person hits his or her weakness spot the emotions comes out. Very often we blame the other person for being emotional but we do not know how much we contribute to other person emotions. The single biggest reason comes is lack of understanding of the other person or nagging the other person. Finally we blame the person for being emotional.

I dont think having emotions is worng or bad but use the emotions in a more positive manner or divert to rightful way. If the emotionsl are used in a negative manner it spells disaster. I have gone through emotions various times but certainly i try to use the emotions in a positive way rather than negative manner.

In the epcis which i have read i may think that leading Saints like Thyagraraga, Thirunavukarsar all had emotions but their emotions are dedicated to God. Maruti was also emotional with Lord Ram. In fact the saying is that people who worship Lord Maruti is blessed by Lord Ram more than worshipping Lord Ram, because the dedication to Ram is extremely high. This dedication comes out of emotion. These are positive emotions. The example of negative emotions is King Drudharashtra attachment to his sons without being rationale. The other positive emotion but not to the right person is Karna's attachment to Duryodhana. In today parlance, we may call Karna as emotional because though he was aware that Lord Krishna is on the other side and supporting Duryodhana will not prevent the inevitable yet he chose the path because of his attachment to Duryodhana.

The primary reason for any emotion is dedictaion or possessive of any object or relation. In my view dedication to a right cause or possessive of a relation is not bad but keeping yourself positive is important. In our real life we are dedicated to certain relation or association. I consider the dedication in a right manner is not bad and certainly this dedication will keep you active. Another important factor leads to positive emotions is dedication without expectations. A dedictaion without expectations will improve the state of mind and helps us to overcome disappointments. Therefore i dont think being emotional is bad but be positive on the relation or object which you are possesive. If it is like Karna attachment it is welcome. Let the "emotional fool" be considered "emotional intelligent" and certainly it helps the people.
To conclude i may be emotional but certianly my emotions are positive and for me any relation which i create is a life long relation irrespective of how other person thinks or treats me and absolutely no expectations of any reciprocation. Have a great day.